


golden nostalgia

by syzygies (incendiarism)



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Alice in Wonderland Fusion, Ambiguous Relationships, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Fire, Inspired by Fantasia MV, M/M, Time Travel, Trippy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:28:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24400606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/incendiarism/pseuds/syzygies
Summary: A wash of crimson and amber bursts across the air in a flare. It brings with it a figure, proudly draped in white, draped in purity. One hand clutched around a ring of keys, the other one raised as he notes the time. There’s a certain arrogance to him, a certain boldness—purpose that becomes a slight swagger in his step, confidence that makes up the foundation of his posture and guides him along with ease.That sort of surety?It’s the mark of insanity.
Relationships: Im Changkyun | I.M/Yoo Kihyun
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10
Collections: violently tender





	golden nostalgia

**Author's Note:**

> wheee stream fantasia x :] target vibes are soft trippy i think. it's not the fantasia mv exactly, but it borrows a lot of imagery as inspo! thank you for clicking, i hope you enjoy!

Remember how the water falls into light, the way the blue melts slowly into the warmth. How time falls into fluid. The glory of the clock hands circling each other in an infinite merry-go-round, the flourish of the chandeliers reigning from up high above. The brilliance of the gold set deep against the solid black.

It’s elegance at its finest; it’s grandeur brought to life.

Commit it all to memory. Burn every detail into your mind.

Changkyun moves through the gold gilded hallways mechanically, shoes lightly clicking on the pristine tile. Step after step. Hands of a clock. Tick-tock. He’s got a strange little tremor in his step: one that can only be chalked up to incredible nervousness, extreme excitement, or some hysterical mix of both. Something that dwells in the realm of uncertainty, of gray areas and blurred lines.

Remember all of this as well, before time trips on its own feet and stops running.

He reaches a room that’s just as abandoned as the rest of the corridors—all lavish and done-up, but terribly hollow. There’s a click. Jingling keys. The sound darts across the open space, reverberates around the emptiness. Something like a church bell ringing through a town square—but sharper, more rigid. Harder edges. Cleaner cuts.

A wash of crimson and amber bursts across the air in a flare. It brings with it a figure, proudly draped in white, draped in purity. One hand clutched around a ring of keys, the other one raised as he notes the time. There’s a certain arrogance to him, a certain boldness—purpose that becomes a slight swagger in his step, confidence that makes up the foundation of his posture and guides him along with ease.

That sort of surety?

It’s the mark of insanity.

He makes his way towards Changkyun, his mouth curling into a soft smile as he speaks. “Hello, darling. I’m glad you could make it.”

Changkyun finds himself smiling back, perhaps despite himself. “Of course, Kihyun. Wouldn’t miss it for the world,” he replies as he moves to meet him in the middle.

And Changkyun lets himself be held by Kihyun for a second, taking the time to submerge himself in the brief moment of peace that’s offered. To reacquaint himself with this feeling before it escapes him once more—it’s nice; it’s calming.

If only everything was that simple.

Kihyun pulls back first. Fixes Changkyun with a look, carefully examines his condition, and then sighs. “I’m sure you’re already well aware, but this isn’t the end. You’ve still got a long way to go.”

Changkyun laughs, a dry sort of thing. “I figured about as much.”

“Then I suppose this means you’re ready for the next jump?” Kihyun says as he busies himself with fixing the collar of Changkyun’s shirt. It’s sweet, how he still finds it in himself to fuss over these sorts of things even as reality careens out of control around them. Oddly touching. Some pocket of normalcy—or as close to normalcy as they can get.

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” Changkyun says, puncturing his words with a mock salute.

Kihyun scoffs. “I’m sure that you’ve gotten the hang of things at this point.”

“Yep. Be as efficient as possible, don’t stray too far off course, try not to fall for the illusions—” Changkyun prattles the list easily off the top of his head, having memorized the speal after endless nagging from Kihyun— “So on and so forth. Piece of cake.” He flashes a winning smile as he fiddles with the lighter in his hand.

“Dumbass. Don’t get cocky either.” Kihyun flicks his forehead lightly, and Changkyun flinches.

“Oh yeah? What about you then?”

A pause. Kihyun scrunches his nose ever so slightly— “It’s not the same for me. You know that.”

Sure. He knows it, but that doesn’t stop him from deflating a bit at the reminder, staring down at his shoes. “Hey, fake it till you make it, right?”

Kihyun’s gaze softens. “Right. Sorry. You’ll do great as always; I know it.” His hand finds one of Changkyun’s and gives it a little squeeze, and the gesture does well in restoring some of Changkyun’s faith.

Enough so that he says, “Yeah, yeah. Enough talking, let’s get this show on the road. I wanna make it in time for dinner this go-around.”

Kihyun chuckles a little bit and then sinks into a bow. “As you wish,” he says, before pecking Changkyun on the cheek and disappearing—right as the room breaks out in chaos.

It starts with the bodies. It always starts with the bodies, and yet he never seems to get used to it.

It starts with them swarming endlessly into the room, flooding from each door in a mob-like frenzy. Hands, skin, flesh on flesh. Twisted limbs flailing around, struggling to establish a place for themselves in the crowded room. And with the way they’re everywhere and anywhere? You might as well be swallowed up whole.

Changkyun lets his eyes fall shut as he thumbs over the lighter a few times for good luck. Counts down in his head—

Tick-tock. Three, two, one. Action.

He flicks the lighter to life and opens his eyes.

There’s nothing quite like watching the world burn, watching everything ignite from one tiny spark. The way the heat presses in and holds you in its crushing embrace, or the way the clocks go haywire, unable to keep up with time collapsing in on itself. The way everything melts away into incomprehensible, distorted shapes right before your very eyes, like something out of a surrealist painting.

And there’s nothing quite like the accompanying mixture of utter exhilaration and sheer terror that lurches in your throat. Nothing quite like this certain joyride of a fantasy trip.

_Do you still remember?_

Good.

Nostalgia is another word for rabbit-hole. Follow the White Hare down the chasm, don’t get lost. Keep in mind the consequences if you fail—use it to _keep going_ , keep pushing further and further.

Keep in mind the fact that no matter how much you may try to rewind time, you don’t get a do-over. Not for this. This isn’t a fairytale sort of fantasy where everything has a destined happy ending—far from it. This is more of a hazy dream: one where anything can be derailed at any moment, one where you’re always one misstep away from everything devolving into a nightmare.

Changkyun steadies himself. Holds his head up high and defiant—even as vertigo surges up in his vision to match. Feels the sensation of his feet on the ground leave him, watches his vision blur as the flames converge on his body and carry him away. Makes one last remark to Kihyun, who he knows is still listening— 

“See you on the other side.”

**Author's Note:**

> this is another one of my 1k write in a day unbetated fics! written to fulfill my may fic quota. the wonderland influence is not as strong here as it is in [luce in altis](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22783318) or [clockwork](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23208826), but it is still present!
> 
> thank you so very much for reading. feel free to tell me what you think on twitter, cc, or the comments! please. even if you leave a one word comment saying "cool" i will be happy.
> 
> twt: [@nanodarlings](https://twitter.com/nanodarlings)  
> cc: [aphelions](https://curiouscat.me/aphelions)  
> 
> 
> [inspiration](https://hereinevitably.dreamwidth.org/5444.html)


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